The Ex-Effect

Sometimes, It soooo haaaard to say goooooodbye to yeeesteeeerrrrdaaaayyyy. Then sometimes its swift, clean, & painless. But why is it that even long after all parties, or at least half of the couple, has moved on, some seem to show their ugly heads? I once dated a guy I'll call "The Serpent" (& trust that the name does him very much justice) that was a bad a bad decision from the first "date". But at the time I was in a rebellious, "I am the master of my own destiny" & "I'll do whatever I want, This is MY LIFE, HEAR ME ROAR" stage & kept this guy around out of pure spite of everyone I had, up until that point, lived my life to satisfy. I always knew that even though we had known each other since middle school & somewhere deep down inside, there was a tiny, teeny, weeny piece of a decent man, that he would never be the one waiting for me at the alter let alone be anything long term. So no there was no hurt when I called it quits. There was somewhat of a relief though. But over a year & a half later, I seem to have run-ins that are very unwelcome, more recently in my office. Time & time again it has been proven that dwelling in the was & used to be only prolongs your healing & ability to deal with the now & is of life. It leaves me to question why it is so hard to simply let bygones be bygones?